The Top 12 Stupid FDA Warning Labels

12 Cell phones:  "Phone should always be in the off position 
   before being lodged up your ass by the angry motorist you
   just rear-ended."

11 Jaegermeister:  "What can you possibly be thinking?"

10 Viagra:  "Just remember, chump, you're STILL fat, bald  
   and ugly!"

9 The Clapper:  "Use of this product near a construction site
  is not recommended."

8 Pineapple:  "Not to be inserted rectally.  
  No, seriously -- it's not a good idea."

7 Rogaine:  "Excessive use may result in a career as a 
  boxing promoter."

6 Zima:  "Merely holding this bottle is obliterating your
  already-remote prospects of getting laid."

5 Raquel Welch:  "Contents may have settled."

4 Windows98:  "May cause unpredictable behavior and loss 
  or corruption of d$@@NQ t!"z +~]]J; FATAL EX&~d"

3 Whitman Sampler:  "Caution - you never know what you're 
  gonna git."

2 El Presidente Cigars:  "Should only be enjoyed orally."

1 Prozac:  "Whatever"